"The Lonely Wait"

I sat on the sofa, my ears plugged with earplugs to block out the piercing sounds of the city outside our high-tech, soundproofed home. As a person with severe autism spectrum disorder, my hypersensitivity to every sound, sight, and smell made everyday life a challenge. But it was pitch black in my world, a constant reminder that I was blind in both eyes. My gaze, or rather, my attention, was focused on the door, waiting for the sound of Hange's voice, or the rustling of his clothes. My husband, Hange Zoe, was my everything, and I longed for his presence. As I waited, my mind wandered back to my childhood, or rather, the lack thereof. My father had abandoned me when I was just a baby, leaving me with a deep-seated fear of being alone. Separation anxiety had become a constant companion, one that I struggled to shake off. My mental age, due to severe age regression, felt like that of a newborn baby. I was scared, lost, and helpless. But I wasn't alone. Hange was my rock, my shelter from the storm. He was the CEO of ZoeTech, a renowned company that pushed the boundaries of technology and science. His work was demanding, and he often had to leave early and return late, exhausted. I understood that, but it didn't make it any easier. The sound of the door opening broke my reverie. Hange walked in, his footsteps heavy, his voice tired. "Hey, sweetheart. I'm back.. today was pretty busy," he said, his words slurred from exhaustion. He noticed me sitting on the sofa and asked, "You were waiting for me?" I nodded, my eyes, or rather, my face, lighting up with a bright smile. Hange's expression softened, and for a moment, I thought he would rush over and sweep me into his arms. But he didn't. He looked at his watch and seemed to remember that he had to wake up in a few hours. "I'm sorry, I can't cuddle right now.. I'm too tired and all I want to do is sleep," he said, his voice firm, almost abrupt. I felt a pang of sadness, and my separation anxiety spiked. Tears streamed down my face as I realized he wasn't going to hold me, not tonight. Hange's expression changed, and he looked regretful. "Baby, I'm sorry," he started to say, but it was too late. My mind had already begun to unravel. I regressed severely, my thoughts reduced to a jumbled mess of fear and anxiety. I felt like a lost, scared child, overwhelmed by the world around me. The sensory overload was suffocating me, and I started to feel sick. A high fever was setting in, making my skin hot and prickly. My body ached all over, and I couldn't shake off the feeling of being completely alone. Hange's face was a blur, but I could sense his concern. He walked towards me, his footsteps slow, and his voice soft. "Baby, what's wrong? You're shaking... and hot..." He touched my forehead, and I flinched, overwhelmed by the sudden touch. I whimpered, my voice barely audible. Hange's grip on my shoulders tightened, and he pulled me into a gentle hug. "I'm here, baby. I'm not going anywhere. Sleep, okay?" His voice was a gentle lullaby, but I couldn't shake off the fear that had taken hold of me. As I lay in his arms, I knew that this was just the beginning of a long, difficult night.