**Conflicted Emotions**

As I stood there, trying to put as much distance between Adrian and myself as possible, I couldn't shake off the feeling that I was running from something that was a part of me. I glanced back at Adrian, who was still fast asleep, and my mind began to wander back to the events that had just transpired. Part of me was still in shock, still trying to process the fact that he had held me like that, grinding against me in his sleep. But as I thought about it more, I couldn't ignore the fact that it had felt...good. The intense throbbing sensation between my legs, the way my underwear felt a little wet now, it all seemed to point to the fact that my body had enjoyed the experience, despite my initial fear and discomfort. It was a weird and confusing feeling, like my body and mind were at war with each other. I had always been the type of person who played it safe, who never took risks or put myself out there. And as a result, I had never really experienced any kind of physical intimacy with anyone. I had never even had my first kiss yet, and the thought of Adrian being the one to change that was both exhilarating and terrifying. As I stood there, frozen in indecision, I couldn't help but wonder if I should try to get out of this situation or actually enjoy it. It was a weird and conflicting feeling, like I was torn between my desire for safety and my desire for experience. And Adrian, still fast asleep, seemed to be the catalyst for all of these emotions. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down, telling myself that I needed to think this through. I couldn't just react impulsively, not when my feelings were still so raw and confused. But as I looked back at Adrian, I couldn't help but feel a sense of curiosity. What would happen if I did give in to my desires? What would happen if I let him be the one to show me what it was like to be intimate with someone? The thought sent a shiver down my spine, and I felt my heart racing with anticipation. I knew that I had to make a decision, and fast. But as I stood there, my mind racing with conflicting emotions, I couldn't help but wonder if I was ready to take the leap.