**Chapter 1: Fractured Vulnerability**

I'm enveloped in darkness, my blindness a constant companion that shapes my understanding of the world. The sounds around me are a cacophony of chaos, each one piercing my eardrums like a shard of glass. As a sufferer of severe autism spectrum disorder, my hypersensitivity to every stimulus is a never-ending battle. The simplest tasks become Herculean challenges, and the world feels like an abyss of uncertainty. My mind is a jumble of infantile thoughts, a product of severe age regression that has reduced my mental state to that of a newborn baby. I'm aware of my body, but it's a foreign entity, subject to the whims of my fragile mind. My emotions are a maelstrom of fear and anxiety, rooted in the abandonment by my father when I was just a baby. The pain of being left behind has left an indelible mark, making me terrified of being alone. My face is a map of my traumatic past, disfigured by the cruel hands of my abusive father. I've learned to hide behind a mask, revealing my true self only to the one person I've come to trust – Hange, my beloved boyfriend and section commander of the Survey Corp. He's my rock, my safe haven, and my everything. I'm gay, and my love for Hange is pure and unadulterated. As I sit in the dimly lit room, I'm acutely aware of the presence of others around me. The Survey Corp members are a rough bunch, and I've often been the target of their bullying. They don't understand me, and I don't expect them to. But Hange always stands up for me, shielding me from their cruelty. Today is like any other day, with the sounds of the barracks and the murmur of conversations providing a constant background hum. I'm trying to focus on my tasks, but my anxiety is simmering just below the surface. I can feel the familiar sensation of sensory overload building, like a gathering storm. Suddenly, a hand reaches out and grasps my mask, pulling it away from my face. I whimper, my heart racing with fear, as I'm exposed to the cruel gazes of my tormentors. "Hey, look at the freak's face!" one of them jeers, their voice like a knife cutting through my fragile psyche. I begin to cry, uncontrollable sobs racking my body as I feel completely insecure about myself. Hange notices my distress and rushes to my side, his eyes blazing with fury as he takes in the scene before him. He grabs the bullies by the throat, his voice low and menacing. "How dare you bully my little boy? Do you have any idea what he's gone through?" he thunders, his words a shield that wraps around me, protecting me from the cruelty of the world. As Hange stands up for me, I feel my anxiety spike, and my body begins to shut down. The sensory overload becomes too much to bear, and I start to feel sick. A high fever rages through my body, leaving me weak and helpless. Hange's face is etched with concern as he realizes what's happening to me. He knows that my condition is getting worse, and I can sense the weight of his decision. He has no choice but to retire me early from the Survey Corp, a thought that fills me with a mix of emotions. Commander Erwin approaches us, his expression a mixture of curiosity and concern. Hange explains everything that happened, his words a steady stream of comfort and reassurance. "My boyfriend has to retire early due to his condition getting severely worse," he says, his voice firm and resolute. As I look up at Hange, I know that I'm not alone. He's here for me, and together, we'll face whatever comes next. But for now, I'm trapped in this abyss of uncertainty, my only solace the love and protection of my beloved Hange.